What About the Mormon Religion?

By me, the beliefs espoused by Mormons are ridiculous. But, let me hasten to say, they are no more ridiculous than the beliefs espoused by Christians. Or in fact, the beliefs of any other religion. The thing that sets the Mormon myths apart is that the Mormon Church was founded only 177 years ago. Back in 1830 when Joseph Smith started his Church of Christ, later called the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, Jedediah Smith and William Sublette lead the first wagon train on a 500 mile trek through Indian country that proved overland travel to the Pacific was possible. The year 1830 is a year Americans can get in touch with through our own history. As opposed to the event that happened 2000 years ago and jump-started Christianity or the event 4000 years ago that gave rise to Islam. The touchstone of both the Mormon belief and the Christian belief is Jesus Christ. But the Mormon belief adds a few new wonders to the old wonders of virgin birth and man-God. And the Mormon wonders are only 177 years old. Those Mormon marvels include golden plates given to Joseph Smith (who was a renowned charlatan in Manchester, New York) by an angel named Moroni. And the plates had strange writing on them that looked like hieroglyphics but not really. The writing only could be translated by Joseph Smith with the help of special spectacles and two divining stones called Thummim and Urim (not the same as the divining stones used by ancient Hebrews, but in the same category). And after Smith translated the writing on the gold plates, the Angel Moroni took them back and disappeared to the realm from which he came. Well okay, all religions have their myths. But Mormon and presidential candidate Mitt Romney is being roundly criticized by other Mormons for saying that Jesus will return to Jerusalem. All Mormons know that Jesus will come back to Missouri and that the Garden of Eden is in Missouri. Yes, I have a hard time with the Virgin birth and Jesus being a man-God. But hey, that was a long time ago and religions tend to embroider on original events over a long period of time. But I have a harder time with the Mormon myths that were being thought up about the time my great-great-grandmother was born. A lot of the original Mormon tenets have been shit-canned. All that polygamy stuff and black bigotry ugliness and who knows about the magic underwear? But, Mormons still believe that Jesus is supposed to come back to Missouri where he was born and that the Garden of Eden is in Missouri. Another thing I find hard to swallow is that Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) converted to Mormonism. He wasn’t born into it like Mitt Romney. A lot of us accepted a lot of nonsense when we were born into religions. A lot of us took a look and said, I don’t think so. But converting is something else altogether. When I was married to a Roman Catholic I went to classes to see about converting. Okay, I admit, the priest running the classes looked like Montgomery Clift. But I took the whole idea of converting seriously and I studied and I thought about it and read about it and prayed about it and finally I said, Look, Monty...I mean, Look Father, I can’t do this. I just can’t swallow this stuff. Not now. Not at my age. And Father Monty said, in effect, I understand. But Harry Reid and his wife converted to Mormonism. They were grown-up people and they took a look at John Smith and his con games in New York and the Angel Moroni, and the Golden Plates and the strange writing (which turned out to be gobbledegook), and Jesus being born in Missouri and the Garden of Eden and Genesis all happening in Missouri and they said, Right! That’s for me! I just don’t understand that. Religions are all fantastical, but the Mormon Church is breathtaking in its bizarre beliefs. Which makes Thomas Jefferson’s idea of keeping church and state separate very wise indeed. Jefferson wrote his letter to the Danbury Baptists about a "wall of separation between church and state," in 1802. And that was 18 years before Joseph Smith had his first “vision” and thought up his Mormon scam. At least science fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard came out and admitted his dianetics (Scientology) nonsense was a con job. But when money started rolling in from the sale of his book, he said "the creation of dianetics is a milestone for man comparable to his discovery of fire and superior to his inventions of the wheel and arch." What’s better than turning lead into gold? Inventing a religion.