What Were They Thinking?

Following is a sampling of nonsense being printed about Israel’s attack on Lebanon and a real-world translation: Israel’s top commanders say that knocking out Hezbollah in Lebanon may take many weeks. Translation: We miscalculated. It can’t be done...EVER! Hezbollah has built stalwart defenses and elaborate bunker systems and it will take a while for the Israelis to get in there and deny that space. Translation: The Israelis grossly underestimated Hezbollah and the State of Israel will be old as Methuselah before it can neutralize those bunkers. There is a debate in Israel over the army’s tactics and performance, but it’s centered on the effectiveness of the air war and the slow speed of ground operations. Translation: There is a consensus in Israel that everything the army has done in the last two weeks has been ill conceived and ineffective. Israelis say Hezbollah has no armor or easily visible storehouses or logistics lines and its members live among the civilian population of southern Lebanon, storing their weaponry in civilian buildings. Translation: The reason members of Hezbollah live among civilians in Lebanon is that the Lebanese like and trust Hezbollah. Never before in history has a terrorist organization had such state-of-the-art military equipment. Translation: Never before has Israel been so ill equipped, ill advised and delusional. Hezbollah has features of a stateless terrorist organization, but it also holds territory — and is quite dug in there — and is able to hold at risk the population of the regional superpower in the way that only national militaries once could. Translation: Holy shit! Those guys control actual real estate and they have the support of the Lebanese people. Who knew? A former paratrooper says, “I admit I had hoped for better from the army.” Translation: What a bunch of idiotic fuck-ups! It’s not just about the missiles and launchers, it’s about the roads and transport and the ability to command and control. All that is being degraded. But it’s going to take a long time. I don’t believe this is going to be over in the next couple of days. Translation: This thing is never going to be resolved…ever…not in a million years. There may be a new strategic situation in the making because Israel does not have the overwhelming strategic superiority that it thought it had. Translation: Hoo-boy! Those Israelis are crazy as George W. Bush. Secretary of State Rice took no questions from reporters during her Middle East swing. Translation: There were no questions, no one takes her seriously. Rice’s aides say she limited her public remarks to avoid jeopardizing international efforts to halt two weeks of fighting that has left at least 386 Lebanese and 41 Israelis dead, forced thousands of Lebanese from their homes and Israelis into underground shelters. Translation: We realize she’s an empty suit with no plan. Why talk when no one is listening? Demonstrators chanted, “Condoleezza Rice go home.” An upraised middle finger needs no translation.