The President is a Dope

(With apologies to Richard Rodgers, Oscar Hammerstein II, the entire cast and crew of 1947's “Allegro” and the song “The Gentleman is a Dope”.) The President is a dope, a man of no appeal. A clumsy Joe who wouldn't know a Samba from a Reel. The President is a dope and not my cup of tea. How did he get in the White House? By fraud and perfidy. The President isn't bright, he doesn't know the score. A siege will come, he'll say “Ho-hum” and lie down for a snore. The President's eyes are blue, but little do they see. How did he get in the White House? By lies and perjury. He's got an awful problem. It stinks to heaven high. He'll try to snow the people, but they know it's all a lie. The President is a dope, he isn't very smart. He's got a mug you'd love to slug And smash with all your heart. The President is a dope, doesn't know how bad it's gonna be. Look at me laughing my ass off. He never looked good to me. As if he'd look good to me.