I used to get off on the
Lenten Rites in the Episcopal Church of denial, and shame and recrimination
over the Crucifixion of Christ. I used to love the hymns and the liturgy, the
reminders of what Christ went through He did it for us, the church says.
Some time ago I found the
Good Friday reenactment of Christ's Passion tiresome and I stopped going to
Good Friday services. Eventually, I got tired of the whole Episcopal Church and
I stopped going. But four-and-a-half years ago, I came back to the Episcopal
Church. I had missed it. I missed the tradition of getting up and getting dressed
up and going to church on Sunday. I decided if I was going to come back, I
would do it whole-hog. I started going to Evening Prayer, became involved in
the Altar Guild. I wrote a column for my church newsletter. I started attending
Bible Study. And I went to classes for those interested in joining the
Episcopal Church, those desiring Baptism and those desiring to reconfirm their
commitment, which is what I wanted to do and did.
But now…not so much.
I cannot bear to go to Lenten
Services leading up to Good Friday which I do not relate to. I didn't even go
to Palm Sunday services this year. I had always loved getting the palms and
turning them into little crosses—admittedly, a distraction during the Palm
Sunday sermon, but still, I liked Palm Sunday and looked forward to the denouement
the next week…the joy of Easter.
But this year, I probably
won't go to Easter Services either.
Maybe I'll feel like going to
church again after Easter. I always liked Pentecost.
You could say I'm depressed
about getting old and finding it difficult to walk anywhere, including church.
And if you did say that, you'd be right.
But there is more going on.
Yesterday, in a Facebook comment, I suggested the Anglican Communion needed to
look inward to find the reason for a declining membership. I suggested that
when any design does not work or is difficult to operate, it is not the user's
fault, it's the design's fault.
